What a Hell of a Year! :)

Hello, 2015.

I was relieved to finally get 2014 over and done with. It has been a year of many shocks and surprises, with plenty of growth filtering in through the cracks after the pressure is gone.

The not-so-good:

1. For the first time in my life I did not have stable employment.
2. Obi, an abandoned dog that my friend Cyn adopted from our old office, died in February.
3.  Snoopy, the dog I adopted from a friend in 2008 died in early April. Cried for weeks. He was like a child to me. 
4. My grandmother had a terrible stroke in late April.
5. I injured my knee while lifting my grandmother in the hospital (guess I wasn't as strong as I thought I was hahaha).
6. Had to limp for almost a month. Also swore off stairs.
7. Had the worst job interview in human history with a Japanese company director (my friends had no sympathy; they found it comedy gold instead hahaha).
8. Had a tenant from hell who only paid outstanding rent and utilities after my lawyer sent a letter.
9. Had to shut down our company when my friend and partner decided to pursue another opportunity.
10. Had to leave my beloved apartment and PJ to move for a new job.
11. Was so homesick the first month I was in KK.
12. Missing Unifi, my friends and old haunts in PJ (hello, dearest darling IKEA! Oh how I've missed you!).

 The good:

1. Quit a draining job. I was losing sleep, weight and even hair!
2. Because I was "unemployed", I could come home to see my family for the first time in almost a year.
3. Became a freelance writer, a long-life dream finally realised.
4. Started a company with my best friend; it was good while it lasted.
5. Learned how to sew using the sewing machine.
6. Became a part-time tailor after learning how to sew.
7. Tailored my own four-panel floor-length heavy brocade curtains. Woot!
8. Sewed a green toga from scratch for a company dinner.
9. Got hired for the job of a lifetime: doing communications for a global non-profit.
10. Moved across the South China Sea for the new job with almost nothing in my pockets and without a home too. #crazy
11. Stayed at a backpackers' hostel for the first time while looking at houses in KK.
12. Started working out again after getting clearance from my doc for the stupid knee.
13. Trained self to like oatmeal for breakfast (it tastes better cooked than kept overnight in fridge).
14. Trained self to eat HUGE salads for lunch almost every day.
15. Hosted a junk-food-free Christmas for the family.

I was also single for most of the year but I can't say that it's a good or a bad thing hahaha. I did feel lonely sometimes but it's better to be single than be in a relationship that doesn't make you happy, no?

So what's next for 2015?

1. Fix my finances

My finances got derailed because I was unemployed for four months last year. I aim to pay off my credit card debt this year and sell off my house in Kuching. 

2. Run!

I want to clock at least 10 mins/km this year. Still contemplating running in the 10km run at Borneo International Marathon because I have a work trip that ends a day before the run. 

Before Christmas derailed me (excuses!) I was actually training three times a week. Now I want to do six, because I don't think I am pushing my body enough. 

3. Me, myself, and the Island of the Gods

An overdue solo trip! Looking forward to a week of culinary delights, sescapes, drinks at sundown, and also arts and crafts.

4. Get ready to go to school

I'd like to get my Master's degree (finally eh?) sometime in 2017 via a scholarship. 

Just four goals this year, which perhaps is a tad unambitious compared to the year I turned 30, when I had 30 goals (and actually achieved 18, I think).

I hope 2015 will be kinder to all of us :)

The Geek Goddess

I Still Need You

I took you in when you were barely a month old. It was October 2008. It was a new chapter for both of us: I had just moved in to a new house, and you found a new family: me.

You used to cry at night looking for your mum, waking up the entire neighbourhood. You ended up sleeping in a box next to my bed.

I used to bundle you up in a towel near me for warmth and we would watch TV together after dinner. 

Housebreaking you required me dragging us both out of bed at 6 in the morning for your breakfast and then for you to relieve yourself. Once you slipped into the neighbour's lawn while I was trying to stay awake, waiting for you to poop. Your escape attempt successfully kept me up. 

You also had a thing for rolled up clothes, so I got you a little ball to play with. You hated it though. Never even touched it.

In 2009, I had to leave you with Mummy and Daddy to go to work. It broke my heart. I thought of you every day, almost always with guilt. I felt as if I had abandoned you.

But you flourished despite my absence. From a cute puppy, you grew up to be a very huge and playful dog. Everyone at home loved you. How could they not? You were friendly and kind and loving to everyone you met.

Whenever I flew home, I knew you'd be waiting at the gate. I knew you'd pounce the minute the car door was open, and that getting from the car into the house required the obligatory waltz with you.

Whenever I called home, I'd always ask about the three of you, things like how is Bulan doing, where is Bonnie, and what on earth is Snoopy loudly barking at?

I'd give anything to hear you bark again.

Today, while at work, my heart broke again when Mummy told me you had left us. The vet couldn't save you last night, she said. 

Did you know Mummy couldn't focus on work after that phone call? My entire life I had never seen her cry but she did today, while showing everyone photos of you in her phone.

I tried hard not to cry at work, because I knew no one at work would understand. 

I was mad....no, I was furious at God for not listening to our prayers for you to heal. I know it was selfish, but I prayed for Him to please not take you away so soon, because we still need you.

I still need you.

Snoopy at a few months' old

MIA

Today I realised with much horror that I have not written anything here for about a month now.

Eeeek.

It has been quite a busy period for yours truly. Here's a not-so-short recap of what's been going on for the past one month or so:

February 6 - 28:

La familia

• Flew across the pond back to Red Henna City after a long break with the fam in Camphor Island.
• Hosted my mum and my sis who came to visit for a few days. Mum insisted on dragging her across the pond, alarmed by how obsessed she had become with homework and exams.
• Locked myself out of my bedroom the night I was supposed to pick my fam from the airport. Perfect timing!
• Took the fam to iCity for the first time. Hello, sparking lights, overpriced snacks (a boiled frankfurter costs RM3, I swear I'm not even making this up!) and a pretty warm night!

Self

• I discovered the Suits TV series about two seasons too late. Lol.
• Finally got over my fear of destroying my new sewing machine and stitched a tablecloth as a test on Valentine's Day. Got hooked immediately and so I used it to stitch curtains for the living room. Kicked myself for having such an irrational fear of failure.
• Water disruption in my apartment, followed by power failure. Double mini tragedies. Urgh.
• Lost 2 kg, most likely due to stress.
  

Friends

• Obi-Wan, Cyn's dog, and our old office's mascot, had fallen sick.

March 1 - present day:

Self

• Gained 2kg.
• Thanks to my colleagues who kept asking about it, I finally realised that I did not have a dress for the company's annual dinner, less than a week before D-Day. Went panic shopping to 10 shops in one day. Came home with nothing that suited my body, my budget, and the dress code of the event.
• Sewed a dark emerald toga that costs me less than RM30 in materials. Check out the tutorial here.

• Lost at a speech contest, the same day MH370 went missing. Can't imagine what the family and friends of the passengers and crew must be going through now.
• Lost 2 kg. Hello again, stress.
• Went to Genting for the first time for the company dinner.
• Almost died and gone to heaven upon discovering a huge accessories shop called Rico Galleria in Genting Grand. 

• Decided to DIY my dinner make-up instead of shelling out RM160 for a make-up artist.
• Tried the milk of magnesia trick. Verdict: Fantabulous for keeping the shine at bay!
• Tried Revlon Photoready Two Way Powder Foundation for the first time. Hope to do a review on it.
• Came home from Genting and went straight into the cough-inducing embrace of the thick haze.

Friends

• Bugged friends (hello, Nurrul!) who had sewing experience for days before I decided to make my own dress.
• Discovered Burgatory with JH and DK. Cramped spaces but the juicy burgers made up for it. 
• Created a mannequin with JH as part of our ad-hoc guilt-tripping post-burger workout hahaha.
• Dearest Obi-Wan succumbed to liver failure. I think I used enough tissues to cause deforestation when I got home and the sad news finally sank in. Cyn wrote a poignant piece on him that made me cry even harder whenever I read it.

At the time of writing, MH370 is still missing. Let's pray and hope for the best for all those affected by this tragedy.

The Geek Goddess