Friday, June 20, 2014

The Lost Boys: A Dating Epidemic

Achtung: This post contains strong vocabulary and should be read with a huge glass of scotch.

I guess it's normal to have expectations when it comes to dating. I do expect my dates to have manners, and also the ability to spell properly. Haha.

I also expect someone who claims that they're interested in me to keep maintaining contact. You know, to show that they're still interested to get to know me more. 

See, I never knew how to play dating games that women supposedly play to keep men interested. If I like you, I will try to contact you, and I will try to know you more. That's my only dating M.O.

I have been in the dating scene for the past 11 bloody long years, and it seems to me that there were a lot of guys who claimed to like me, conversed with me regularly, went out with me a few times, then texted or called me semi-daily...

ONLY FOR THEM TO GO *POOF* ONE DAY AND NEVER EVER RETURN!

Or...they are alive but they gave me so many excuses on why they're not regularly contacting me like before:

- My cat died.
- My car died.
- I am busy these days. *I guess we women have all the time in the world, eh?*
- I am overwhelmed by work/family/my stupid team's performance in the World Cup.

Is there a dating black hole for men that we women are not aware of? That maybe there is a secret button on their phone that they accidentally press and their phone screen would swallow them whole and incapacitate them from contacting us further? 

I am very curious to find out why men seemed to drop off the face of the earth after making a lot of effort to imprint their existence in our female brains. I know I am not the only woman to whom this weird disappearing act happens regularly. One of my super nice guy friends said that his female friends also complained about the same thing.

Are the lost boys an epidemic for which there is no known cure?

I guess what I'm trying to say is: if you're not interested in someone, please don't waste their time by contacting them. Ever. Grow some balls and spare us the heartache, thankyouverymuch.  

Because of this mysterious epidemic, I am getting really sick of dating. Sometimes I feel like checking into a convent, swearing men off forever and develop the habit of looking great in a *cough* habit. Teehee.

My *ahem* pragmatic brain always seems to think, "Look, you did your best, but let's face it, this dating shit is not working out for you". My ever-optimistic heart however, begs a different interpretation: "Hey, not all men are bad. There's someone out there for you. You just haven't found him yet". 

I have been searching for him for 11 years, for fuckitty fuck's sake. Where the hell is he? Is his sense of direction so poor to the point of being ridiculous? 

I went through 11 years of disastrous dating attempts and four relationships that went south, yet my stupid heart still wants someone who complements me to grow old with and to raise a family with. Despite my strong objections against having unruly children in public spaces (hello screaming toddlers in a cinema showing a late-night horror movie), I do want to have (well-mannered) children one day. And I know I don't want to be a single parent.  

But as I get older, I have less tolerance for this bullshit called dating. Whenever men give me excuses like "Oh I'm so busy picking up my dog's poo, so I'll text you in another century", all I can hear is this: You're not worth my time, bitch.

Time is a limited resource, gentlemen. If you like me, make it worth my time. And if you don't like me, it's ok to be upfront about it and save both of us a lot of grief instead of playing stupid hide-and-seek. I'm a grown woman. I can handle rejection. *flips hair and roars* 

What I cannot handle are stupid boys who waste my time.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to running my one-woman empire.




The Geek Goddess


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